I was a junior in college when I decided to try a radical form of exercise: 80’s workout videos. I was sitting on my bed thinking about my resolution to work out that year but was still unwilling to go to the gym. Faced with this conundrum, I racked my brain for a gym alternative. It was not long before memories flooded into my mind of times spent working out to old Richard Simmons DVDs.
I want to tell you a little story about the time when I attended a military ball with my friend Shannah. Full disclosure: I am writing this as if it occurred years ago. It did not. I got back from the ball yesterday. Anyway, let’s begin.
I was standing near the front of the recital hall feeling overheated and claustrophobic as I prepared to step onto the stage. As an Admission Office employee, I had been asked to give the university’s introduction presentation to a group of visiting high school music students. I had given this presentation what felt like one thousand times before, so I wasn’t concerned about it before entering the hall. That quickly changed as I mingled with some of the other presenters for the evening and realized how ill-prepared I was to speak to this particular group of music-focused (antisocial) high school music students.
I am not a fan of situations where I must introduce myself. And no, it is not because I have an acute fear of saying my name or having people talk to me. Rather, I hate the conversation that follows an introduction. It is as if one must cram every single documentary-worthy life experience into the next two minutes of conversation. The following is an example of how I feel during said conversations: