Of all the goals that I set in October 2017, the one to “Put an end to any grudges” has intimated me the most. This is because I tend to cling to grudges with the vice-like grip of a toddler clutching their favorite toy. Knowing this as I planned the upcoming year’s goals, I decided to attempt to abolish this practice.
Oh, hello there! I didn’t notice you come into my kitchen. But since you’re already here, why don’t you grab a seat and join me while I prepare some delicious food!
That, ladies and gentlemen, is how I imagine I would start my cooking show if the Food Network would ever get around to greenlighting my pilot. And yes, I would feign surprise at my guest’s arrival every single episode. Anyway, on to the matter at hand.
This has been an interesting blog post to write because most people I know can attest to the fact that I have had a checkered past when it comes to my apparel choices. These poor decisions have been evidenced in the past when I described my style as one that makes me look like “an extra in a searing documentary on the mistreatment of Walmart towards its employees” or when I pointed out how much I used to favor “Wrangler jeans, [a] button-down rodeo shirt, and cowboy boots.” If those two quotes don’t make you realize how bad my style has been, you should probably find a personal stylist.
Did my title make you think that I’m back into running long distances? I am most definitely not (thank you, skiing in Washington, for the knee injury). Instead, I am referring to the sprint towards the end of my year of goals.
I seriously considered starting this with the lyrics to the 2009 song “When I Grow Up,” but I would like to believe that my readers are too highbrow to recognize that dated pop culture reference. The reason that I used a somewhat whimsical title is because I want to talk about the future. The one that I envisioned at different stages of life, and the “future” that I ended up living.
Well, I did it. I finished an intimidating book. Kind of. Let me explain. I challenged myself a few weeks ago to read the 1847 classic Vanity Fair in eight days. It was ambitious, and I did it. Again, kind of.
I wrote a while back about how I was going to read the book War & Peace for my “read a book that intimidates me” goal. Well, it turns out that not only was it intimidating, but it was also incredibly dull (at least the thirteen pages that I read were). Because of this, I was going back and forth about giving that specific book up when another book came along to take its place.
Yep, I just used a sports term. It was essentially clickbait to lure people who know how athletically-challenged I am to this post. So now that it has served it’s purpose (hello, non-habitual, curious readers!), I will begin an utterly non-athletic post.
G’day, mate! Vegemite! Outback Steakhouse? Welp, that just exhausted my Australian lexicon. You may be asking, “Dan, why are you using Australian slang? Is this your way of introducing a bold move across the world?” It is not, but it does signify what I consider to be an exciting development in my writing.
Most people who know me can attest to the fact that I have wanted to visit Washington State for many years. Well, this is the year where I decided to finally follow through by visiting the place that has intrigued me for so long.