120 Days Later…

I have dropped the ball when it comes to my personal life. For a while, I was doing a fantastic job of setting goals and proceeding to knock them out of the park. I was organized, habitual, and successful. Unfortunately, those attributes have almost entirely ceased to exist. Somewhere in the past few months, I have watched myself break most of my habits and descend into a life that contains little passion. Instead of challenging myself, I have allowed myself to become lazy, and I want that to end. Now.

I believe that much of this has stemmed from my lack of writing. It has been a whopping 120 days since I last posted on my blog, and that is quite unusual. I used to write quite regularly, and it was a habit that greatly enriched my life since it served me in both a therapeutic way and as a means of accountability.

The blog was therapeutic because it allowed me to channel my thoughts and my passions through a creative medium. I was happy to share the ups and downs in my life, and that outlet gave me a way to process the what I was going through at that time.

It served as a means of accountability because I would set goals, and I knew that because I had written them on my blog, I needed to follow through. When I stopped writing, I ceased pursuing the completion of my goals. This means that I have twelve goals remaining to complete in the next seven months. That may not seem unreasonable (because it isn’t), but I had intended to work on these goals regularly through the entire year.

You may be asking, “If your blogging was so ‘enriching,’ why would you stop writing?” I believe that it boils down to perfectionism. I began overthinking my posts and worrying that they would not be good enough. Instead of writing for the joy of creating, I started to stress about how people would perceive what I wrote. In hindsight, that is nonsensical. The New York Times is not reviewing my blog; rather, it is mainly friends and family checking in on my life because they have a genuine interest in me. I plan to keep this in mind as I bring blogging back into my life, and I hope that it will give me the freedom to find the pleasure in creating again.

The goals are back on, and I am ready to make this my best year yet.

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